Tuesday, April 25, 2006

For indians !!!

Bjp and Congress
Once a boy gave a lotus to girl. The girl gave him a tight slap.
The boy asked her the reason for slapping him.
The girl told him: you gave me bjp so i gave you congress!!!!!!!!!!!

Musharraf & Vajpayee

Musharraf feels sorry about Vajpayee leading a lonely life and proposes that if India gives Kashmir to Pakistan - then Pakistan will marry off the most beautiful woman there to Vajpayee.
Vajpayee agrees but has a condition - if I divorce the lady - then Pakistan has to be merged with India.
Go to Hell
A Lawyer dies and goes to heaven. He knocks on the old pearly gates and out walks St. Peter. "Hello mate," says St. Peter, "I’m sorry, no Lawyers in heaven."

"What?" exclaims the man, astonished.

"You heard, no Lawyers."

"But, but, but, I’ve been a good man", replies the Lawyer.

"Oh really", says St. Peter. "What have you done, then ?"

"Well" said the guy, "Three weeks before I died, I gave 10 dollars to the starving children in Africa".

"Oh" says St. Peter. "anything else?"

"Well, 2 weeks before I died I also gave 10 dollars to the homeless."

"Hmmm. Anything else?"

"Yeah. A week before I died I gave 10 dollars to the Albanian orphans."

"Okay", said St. Peter, "You wait here a minute while I have a word with the boss."

Ten minutes pass before St. Peter returns.

He looks the bloke in the eye and says, "I’ve had a word with God and he agrees with me. Here’s your thirty dollars back, now take a hike!"
New Jaguar Car
A very excited Lawyer pulls up in a brand new Jaguar and parks outside on the road, close by his place of work. He takes the car to show it off to all his colleagues. He opens the door when suddenly a big truck drives by and rips off the car door. The Lawyer starts screaming and raving at what had happened to his new car and calls 911. The police arrive on the scene ten minutes later. After minutes of shouting and ranting/raving about the car he finally calms down.
The police man say's, "You Lawyers never think about people only materialistic things like cars and are selfish, did you not realise that when that truck hit your car door, it also ripped your arm off from the elbow down".
The Lawyer then shouts out, "Shit, my Rolex".
Laloo's Threat

A major traffic jam was preventing people from moving forward. A motorist shouted out wanting to know what was happening. A guy from the front replied, "Well at the traffic crossing Laloo Yadav is sprawled across the road. He is refusing to move from there!"
"But why?"
"He has lost the elections and will now surely be convicted for corruption and will have to pay lakhs of Rupess as fines! He is threatening to douse himself with kerosene and set himself on fire if people didn't contribute with money to help him pay the fine!"

"So how much has been collected so far?"

"Six litres!"

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